Making an impact

Whether it's as an employee or a parent, do you ever wonder, "Am I really making an impact?  Is the effort I'm giving returning anything?"  I know when my children were younger and I was home with them, some of those days seemed awfully long.  I'd change my shirt for the third time that day because it smelled like the more unpleasant of baby scents and recall with longing the kudos of a client who appreciated a job well done.  I began to wonder what my life would be like once my children were in school full-time and I could return to "work".  Those thoughts came when I wasn't paying attention to what mattered, because I most certainly was making an impact -- in the lives of my family.

Fast-forward a dozen years and I'm seeing another kind of impact.  I'm seeing the impact a foundation has on a nonprofit organization like Good Friend, Inc., when it sends a grant check.  I wish the board directors from the Janice & Raymond Perry Community Fund, Pieper Electric, Inc./Ideal Mechanical, the Green Bay Packers Foundation, the Tracy Family Foundation, the Dorothy Inbusch Foundation, and Potawatomi's Miracle on Canal Street were in the room when I opened the envelopes from them with our grants over the last two months!  Each time, I was so grateful for their support, knowing what an impact we'll be able to make in the lives of students because of these gifts.

Here are some examples from recent weeks:
The mom of a 10-year-old boy with autism sent in this picture.

Her son explained, "After seeing that video, I kinda decided, well, that was pretty interesting. So I decided to make a slogan out of something. So I settled on ZOOBs. At first, it was all reds and greens, but then when I needed something for the dot on the exclamation point, the only thing I could find was two yellows. And then I realized that to make the point stronger, I should use every color in the sentence. So I made an underline out of all of the pieces, but then I decided to change some of the parts of the letters that could be swapped. The end result is the picture. I really hope you enjoyed it as I enjoyed the video."

Here's how the video impacted Nicole: "As a mother of a 10-year-old autistic boy who has often had difficulties with the puzzle piece image, I was pleasantly surprised to watch your video We ALL Fit. I really like that it uses the puzzle metaphor to reference ALL of us in the world, not just autistic people, and how important it is for us to connect. After I showed the video to my son, he said was inspired to make this creation after watching the video. Thank you for spreading the world that we are all connected and we do all fit."

A woman was driving three children -- her son and two young friends, one of whom has autism and likes talking about her brain-based difference.  The 5-year-old friend didn't really understand what she was talking about, and asked what autism was.  The 6-year-old son started quoting the second verse of "We ALL Fit" to explain. "Autism isn't something that you catch ..." As mom listened, she recognized the lyrics.  She says, "When I called him out on it, he laughed and asked to listen to the song. So we did."

Last fall, a mother had contacted me by email with a sad story about her daughter with autism being misunderstood and bullied at her school.  She was hopeful about this school year, since a new administrator and classroom teacher were happy to welcome us to conduct a Peer Sensitivity Workshop for all sections of her grade.  Following the third grade student training earlier this month, mom wrote, "I just wanted to share with you all that when I picked A up yesterday, she said that she had kids actually coming up to her and asking to play with her. This is the very first time she has ever experienced this. She said it made her so happy.  She spent the rest of the day on cloud nine and telling everyone she loved them."

Thank you for helping us make an impact!  Keep sharing your uplifting stories with us!

A week to remember

Before we even heard the song, we couldn't wait to share it.  And while we finally got that chance last Thursday, most people don't know that presentation was the culmination of two years of collaboration.  Good Friend, Inc. co-founder Denise Schamens met Greg Marshall of The Figureheads "by chance" at an area promotion.  That conversation lead to a meeting near The Figureheads' Milwaukee studio, and an exchange of ideas began.

We were so grateful that Dave Olson and Greg Marshall (back row, left) and
Miss Wisconsin Teen USA Patience Vallier (back row, center) were able to join us
at Cushing Elementary in Delafield, Wis., on Thursday, Jan. 9, for the world premiere!

To get a better feel for Good Friend's mission and impetus for our new elementary school film project, Greg attended our May, 2012, Community Conversation: Meaningful Inclusion in Elementary School, sacrificing time with his family to be with us.  While we continued to spread the word about our vision, busyness with our research study postponed forward motion on the film and music until the spring of 2013.  Last summer, the script was written, the funds were raised, the cast was chosen, and the filming completed.  We had shared progress with Jeremy Bryan and Greg, who in turn shared it with Dave Olson.  The Figureheads' musical component was our missing puzzle piece.  Until it wasn't.

It was on Sept. 17 that we heard the song for the first time -- and we were in love.  Though it wasn't what Denise and I were expecting, it was exactly what it needed to be.  And as it turned out, the song's title was the same as the short film's -- "We ALL Fit".

Get a shirt to commemorate the song and film --
just like the cast and crew wore at the premiere! http://www.goodfriendinc.com/store.php

Most of the student cast of the short film returned to be the ensemble cast of the music video, which Denise directed and Scott Dahm filmed with assistance from Michael Foucault.  Tim Miller worked with Denise on the video editing after Dave recorded additional singers Noelle Budde (my daughter), Evelyn Barta, and Regan Carter at his studio, mixing it all into the magical anthem it has become.  The single is available for download on iTunes and Amazon MP3, and is streaming on Spotify, to name a few outlets.

So, yes -- it's incredible that the news story our local FOX affiliate aired has been shared more than 1,000 times in the last week.  And, yes -- we're thrilled that our song promoting autism acceptance and bullying prevention has been viewed more than 6,000 times on YouTube.  But what makes our hearts soar is hearing from you.  What does this song mean to you?  How have you shared it?  How do you plan to use this song to make a difference at your school and/or in your community?

"We ALL Fit" single release!

In 10 days, on Thursday, January 9, 2014, at 10 a.m., some 500 teachers, students, administrators, community stakeholders, and cast members will gather at Cushing Elementary in Delafield, Wis., to see the "We ALL Fit" music video by The Figureheads for the first time.  Following the world premiere event, the video will be available on YouTube and the single (featuring Noelle Budde, Evelyn Barta, and Regan Carter) will be available through online music outlets.  Like our Facebook page to get the links after the premiere.

Since space is limited for the premiere and reception to follow, attendance is by invitation and registration only.  If you did not receive an invitation but wish to come, we would be happy to put you on stand-by, notifying you on Tuesday, January 7, if we still have space available.  Please send an email with your first and last name, title, and organization (if applicable) to chelsea@goodfriendinc.com, subject: I want to come to the "We ALL Fit" premiere.

Whether or not you're able to see the video with us live, you'll want to sing along.  Here are the lyrics, which by themselves are powerful poetry; and with the music, they're unforgettable.

Chorus 

When you look down on the world from a plane in the sky,
you can see that we're all part of a picture. You and I
are the pieces of a puzzle. Yeah, we're all connected;
leaning on each other - so much beauty unexpected.
We're all looking for a good friend - someone that we
can be ourselves with, who will encourage us to be
like one family. That's it!
The secret to the puzzle is knowing we all fit. 

Verse 1 

My favorite puzzles are pictures of people, plants, and the places
I've never been to. They're like portals into worlds and I'm waiting
for magic trees to invite me into the picture and take me
into a story about how I saved the world from a fire-
breathing dragon over lava. That'd be awesome, I know!
What if the planet was a puzzle? Where would all of us go?
I mean, what if you were a piece trying to fit in a spot,
and every time that you try, somebody tells you there's not
enough room for you - like you don't belong in the puzzle. What?!
That'd be tough, and that's why every one of us stands up
for the person and people looking to fit in this puzzle.
We ALL Fit. That's it! It shouldn't be such a struggle. 

Chorus 

Verse 2 

Autism isn't something that you catch.
It's not an itch than you can scratch.
It's like a hidden treasure, and here's a map
to help us all understand where we're at.
As we learn how to respond and react
to our friends with autism and the ways they may act.
As we learn to recognize the gifts they've been given
so that We can move together in one rhythm with ‘em -
back and forth, up and down.
We can rock our bodies and dance around.
We can try to see through each other's eyes.
It can be hard to do, but if we try -
Well, then we're one step closer to the treasure
of being a community and moving on together.
So find out all the ways that you can help.
And in the process you may even find yourself.
Good friends, let’s go! 

Chorus

Bridge 

Sometimes I feel lost and alone.
Wish I had a place that felt like home.
And if I had a friend -
someone who understood -
then that would make a difference,
a difference for the good.
Good friends, let's go! 

Chorus

© 2013 Good Friend, Inc. All rights reserved. 

Please share this song with your school, students, and community!  Help us create a culture of acceptance where children of all abilities are valued and included!

"A Difference for the Good"

I could spend the next month's worth of blogs breaking down the lyrics of The Figureheads' original song, "We ALL Fit", written and produced for Good Friend's upcoming elementary school peer sensitivity film of the same title.  And each week I could focus on a phrase that has come to mean so much more to me over the process of observing the interactions on the film and music video sets.  But with the video scheduled to be available on YouTube within the next month, I don't want to infuse my own experiences into the song for you.  I want you to tell us your stories!

Jeremy Bryan, Dave Olson, and Greg Marshall
of The Figureheads on the set of our music video

Still, I can't resist these lines from the bridge:

And if I had a friend
Someone who understood
Then that would make a difference,
a difference for the good.

What difference has having a friend (or a group of friends) had in your life?  Go back to your elementary school days.  What about then?  What did it mean to you to have a friend?  Forget about trauma and tragedy, like parents divorcing or grandparents dying.  What if you didn't have a friend to get through the daily things, like learning to ride your bike?  Or letting you borrow a pencil when yours broke?  Or handing you a tissue when you were about to sneeze?

What if you wanted a friend desperately, but you were dropped into a new foreign language immersion school, and you didn't speak the language?  Now you need a friend more than ever, but you don't have the tools to connect.  You can't tell them about your interests and don't know how to ask them about theirs.

Consider for a moment that this is what it's like to have autism.  You don't speak the social language, and you don't understand the nonverbal components that are inherent in the customs of this neurotypical world.  But you need a friend.  Because you know that that would make a difference for the good.  Your friend would help you make sense of what you see and hear.  Your friend would stand up for you when others, unaware of the way your brain is wired, tease, belittle, and bully you.  Your friend would see when you need space and when you need support.

When one of the 9-year-old members of our cast heard the bridge for the first time, he told his mom, while rocking to self-regulate and connect to the music's beat, "That's just like me."  She and I had tears in our eyes as we pondered and observed, convicted by the simplicity and the heartbreak of the truth of it all.

Please consider today how you can encourage your typically-developing students to be a friend to a classmate with autism.  If you're not sure how to teach them to make a difference for the good, Good Friend would be happy to help!

A BIG week!

Sometimes, Mondays ROCK!  And yesterday was one of them.  Good Friend kicked off an exhilarating, exhausting week Monday morning with a summary of the findings of the research study conducted by two professors at University of Wisconsin-Whitewater.  We're reserving the best bits of news for the guests of our annual Member Appreciation Night this Friday!  But what we can say is that both our staff in-services and Peer Sensitivity Workshops make a measurable, positive difference in expanding autism awareness, acceptance, and empathy!  Denise and I are still trying to wrap our heads around the magnitude of Simone DeVore and Brooke Winchell's findings, which will be presented at the Council for Children with Behavioral Disorders' annual conference in Chicago next month.

Dr. Brooke Winchell had her work cut out for her as she began to pour over the raw data from the surveys UW-W collected during Good Friend staff in-services and Peer Sensitivity Workshops in the 2012-'13 school year.

Zooming back to host the first of our two open casting calls for "We ALL Fit", our new elementary school peer autism awareness short film, we shifted from one excitement to another.  We met 23 hopefuls for the project, and are realizing we'll have some difficult decisions to make once we complete today's session.  We welcome you to audition!  We have some specific profiles we're looking for, and no acting experience is necessary.  Here's the list:

• girl with autism, age 6-10, who has some reliable spoken language
• boy with autism, age 7-11, who uses a type-to-speak device
• boy age 2-4, dark-haired
• girl age 2-4, blonde-haired, willing to have a tantrum for the camera
• extras: six 10-11 year-olds (mix of boys and girls), three adults (age 25-65), two 12-15 year-olds

Just show up at Citizens Bank of Mukwonago in Waukesha near Center Rd. and Hwy. 59 and go upstairs to the Training Center between noon and 3 p.m. TODAY for a quick on-camera audition.  Call Denise at 262-391-1369 with any questions.

We hope to introduce you to at least a few of our 30 newly-chosen cast members at Friday's Member Appreciation Night.  How many more reasons do you need to join us??  Awards, celebrations, new study findings, an Aaron Rodgers autographed football up for grabs ... PHEW!  Like I said, it's a BIG week!  If you plan to be at Steinhafels in the Community Room at 7 p.m. on Friday, please email Denise if she doesn't know already.

TICK TOCK: Less than two days remain!

We are now in the hourly countdown of our KICKSTARTER crowd-funding campaign!  With some additional donations made to our website and by check by Benny B., Pamme W., Les & Jeannette S., and others, I was able to post a large pledge for "We ALL Fit".  We are now in a mad dash to find $6,400.  Donations made via Amazon payments (with a credit card or Amazon account) are tax-deductible, minus the value of any reward a backer chooses (if any).

Watch the 3:40 video at http://kck.st/126nroy!

Will you please share this project with at least five people and/or businesses today?  Apparently, 30 days is too short a time to tell prospective backers about the value of this film!  But if we don't raise all $10K, we get NOTHING.

Special thanks to $100 backers Megan Dabols, Jackie Dorshorst, Shelly Dretzka, Jake Gould, and Jane Menheer!

In anticipation of the film being fully-funded, we have scheduled open auditions in Waukesha!  Choose which session you'd like to attend: Monday, August 5, from 4 to 7 p.m., or Tuesday, August 6, from noon to 3 p.m.  Each audition should only take a few minutes, but you may have to wait.  Since we're looking for quite a few students with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) in addition to children of typical neurology, if you have a kiddo who can't wait for his or her audition, please contact me (414-510-0385) to set up a specific appointment.  We'll be upstairs in the Training Center of Citizens Bank of Mukwonago (Waukesha office).  Check out the Facebook event for more information.

We're so glad you're with us every step of the way for this elementary school peer sensitivity film!

You Are Invited

You are invited to make a difference.  You are invited to be an inspiration.  You are invited to celebrate friendship.  You are invited to participate!

So far, 21 of you have accepted our invitation to participate in backing our new autism peer sensitivity film, "We ALL Fit".  Special thanks to $100 backers Kim Braatz, Jessica Lowney, Mike Rubingh, and Melanie Walsh!  While the KICKSTARTER campaign is currently reflecting $1,585 in pledges, I have another $600 here from donors who've mailed checks.  THANK YOU!  That puts our project at nearly 22% funded, and we only have a week left of this campaign!  If we don't get $10,000 in pledges by the morning of July 17, the pledges made will not be collected.  So PLEASE -- if you are able to participate by pledging, sharing the campaign via word-of-mouth, email, or social media, or both, DO SO NOW.  This is not a Save-the-Date, but an urgent plea!  Here's the shortened URL: http://kck.st/126nroy

Good Friend co-founder Denise Schamens invited me to help her make our first video more than six years ago.  She and I have developed a rather productive synergy over the short but impactful life of our nonprofit organization.  Without the distractions of home, I managed to get the script written while on vacation, bouncing ideas off her as inspired.  Now Denise is making her final reviews before we release the script to the critique of a broader audience.  That means open auditions are coming soon!  I can tell you that this will be a LARGE cast, and we're looking for a group of some 20 children ages 5-11 (mostly 10- to 11-year-olds), diverse in both their neurology and ethnicity.  We'll also need a few adults.  For details as they're released, join the open Facebook group, Theatre Auditions for Southeastern Wisconsin.  You are invited to audition!

Friday, August 9, from 6:30-8:30 p.m., will be our 6th annual dessert reception Member Appreciation Night at Steinhafels' Community Room in Waukesha, Wis.  Don't let the name fool you -- you don't have to be a member to celebrate with us!  We will be honoring a very special student from Park Lawn Elementary School (Oconomowoc) who embodies our Good Friend autism awareness-acceptance-empathy message.  There will be entertainment, goodies, and information about our organization.  If you're someone who thinks our schools should be places where we foster healthy social-emotional development, you should plan to attend!  Paper invitations will be mailed to our members automatically.  If you want to be included on the mailing list, email me your address.

We also invite you to join Team Good Friend for Autism Society of Southeastern Wisconsin's Dylan's Run/Walk!  The event is on Sunday, Sept. 8, but we need to get our team squared away by Wednesday, August 7!  We have appreciated the support of ASSEW for our first two films, as well as for all they've done for our community.  This event has been fun to participate in ... and then stay for Indian Summer Festival.

What invitations will you accept??

LAUNCHED: Campaign for New Film Project

We've been planning for this for a looooooooong time (just ask Good Friend co-founder Denise Schamens -- she'll tell you): the official start of our new elementary school film project!  It's hard to believe it's been three years since we started work on Choosing To Be a GFF for middle school, and that How Can I Be a Good Friend to Someone with Autism, our first film, was released nearly six years ago!

If you saw our award-winning middle school film, you know how much we grew as filmmakers between our first and second productions.  Can you imagine what our THIRD will be like?  We sure can.  And we have quite a crew assembled who will make it come to pass.

Want to be part of the action?  Check out and share our KICKSTARTER campaign!  We need people to catch the creative vision we have to make this film come to life.  We have less than 30 days (until the morning of July 17) to find $10,000 in pledges.  Here are a few things you should know about this platform and our specific project for We ALL Fit (the title of our upcoming film):

• Because Good Friend is a 501(c)(3) public charity, donations made through the campaign are tax-deductible as allowed by law.  However, if you receive a "Reward" through the campaign, the cash value of the reward is not considered tax-deductible.  Therefore, your acknowledgement from Good Friend will reflect the difference.
• If you pledge an amount other than those listed on our Rewards section, you may still be eligible for Rewards.  Email us for more info.
• Kickstarter uses Amazon Payments to collect pledges, but will not do so until after our campaign has ended (July 17) and ONLY IF we meet our $10,000 goal.  You do not need an Amazon account to make a pledge.
• Backers could be anywhere, and time is of the essence. Help us find them. Please spread the word via email and social media.

We would be negligent if we didn't offer shout-outs to some key players to date in this project ...

• Our creative team, including returning techies Dan Kallenberger and Tim Miller.  You two have been SO patient with us as budding filmmakers and incredibly supportive with our last two projects.  THANK YOU for being on board this time and bringing some fresh talent with you!
• Greg Marshall of Figureheads, Inc.  Our meeting was no accident, and this collabo is going to be EPIC!
• The participants of our May 2012 Community Conversation on Meaningful Inclusion in Elementary School. Your energy that night was inspiring, and made us realize there's NOTHING we can't accomplish when we as parents, therapists, educators, and administrators work together!  (And though I promised notes more than a year ago, they really ARE coming this week!)

Thanks to each of you for BACKING our mission!